Have stroller, will travel

We got Danial a new stroller last week. A cheaper and portable version from his old bulky one. I must say, it's one of the best investment we've made for Danial. Danial is at the stage were he's getting to heavy to carry for a long haul and he's not really ready to walk on his own yet. So, we still need to resort to a stroller to take him around.

I've put it to test by taking Danial to the office to send some documents for processing. I feel like a pro-mom, with Danial in tow and managed to get my work done. Next, I went window shopping with Danial at Alamanda. Again, a success. Hey, this is a piece of cake. I feel like the suburban moms that you watch on TV where they bundled their kids in an MPV, strapping on the seatbelts on the childseats and doing their groceries; minus the MPV of course. So, this is how it feels like to be a full time modern mom.

We even took the stroller on the ERL and LRT to KLCC to get Azrai's new mobile phone yesterday. Good thing Danial is a good traveller. Hmmm... next stop, Hong Kong Disneyland, here we come!

Happy Birthday Rahim!

Saturday, 30th December 2006 is my bro's 31st birthday. Happy birthday Boy! Haven't got the chance to dig up some old pictures. No need new ones as he has loads of it in his flickr page. One might think that next to his runners, he'd probably don't leave home without his camera. Actually it's not a bad idea. I wanted to do that. Yes, I take the camera with me in my handbag but it stays there all the time. Anyway, have a fantabulous day, Boy! We love you!

Never trust your Indon maid

Thank God it's Friday. What a week it has been. God works in wonderous ways. We've found out that Bibik has an unhealthy habit of being friendly with the opposite gender when we accidentally found her purse in the shoe cabinet last Tuesday. I was shocked beyond words. All this while, we've been taken for a ride. What made me more upset was she lied to me with a straight face. I don't know when the truth stopped and when the lie began. I was furious of course that I couldn't sleep that night. I prayed for God to give me strength, wisdom and patience to handle this dugaan.

The next day, I dropped Danial in Setiawangsa and sent Bibik straight to the agent. I thought I was mean when I blew my top the day before but the agent was even more brutal. At least, she did the dirty work for us and we uncovered more unpleasant evidence. Long story short, Bibik is history.

Alhamdulillah, God answered my prayers. I was strong and was surprised at myself. I'm sure it's the right thing to do. How can I trust my precious baby to someone whom I cannot trust? So, now we're back to just the three of us; plus Adik. It's not so bad after all. It's not the end of the world. Somehow, I feel I've gained back my home in totality. I can't explain but it's good to have your home just for yourself. It's still a matter of working around Danial but he's older and more independent now. I can do work and keep an eye on him while he's playing. And of course, Azrai is a gem. He help out a lot with Danial. We make a good team. Yeah... we'll be alright.

On Thursday, I went out from the house as early as 6.45am with Danial to the ERL Station. Danial was still asleep when we sponge bath him and changed his diaper and clothes. He had a late night the night before. We were on the train KL bound at 7.10am and reached KL Sentral by 7.30am. There's plenty of seats in the ERL but I had to stand and hold Danial with one hand on the LRT. We only managed to get some seats after KLCC stop. Another 20 minutes, we arrived in Setiawangsa Station and Danial's Nenek picked us up.

Pak Ngah and entourage was already there. I fed Danial quickly. Had a quick bite and bundled Danial in Nenek's Kancil and we're off to Ipoh by 8.45am. I wasn't worry because it's school holiday and the traffic is quite easy. Slight congestion in the city but it was smooth driving on the highway all the way. Danial was behaving quite well in the journey. He took a short nap and spent the rest of the journey just relaxing and enjoying the trip.

We arrived to Wayak's house by noon. Wayak was not well before but she's OK now. We had lunch there and lepak before we head back to KL. Danial was the star attraction because of his generous supply of *muahs* to everybody. He was definitely bushed and slept all the way back to KL.

Adik came home after 4 days in NZ and we filled him in on the misadventure. Can't say we're sorry. He felt duped as we did. Lesson learned, never trust your Indon maid no matter how sincere they look. After this scarring experience, I don't think I'd want to open my house and have another maid anymore. If everybody help around the house, I'm sure we managed. It's not that the house was spick and span when Bibik was around either.

Another gift God gives me now is I don't need much sleep like I used to. In fact I can't sleep after 12am. It's almost 4am now and I'm wide awake. I've swept and moped the floor, wiped the surface, rearranged books and now blogging and I'm not a little bit sleepy. My clock has been changed to US time now :) At least I can get some work done while everybody is sleeping.

Well, I've always believe in there's a silver lining at the end of the dark clouds. It's good that we discovered Bibik's deception before it's too late. We're humbled by doing the household work and we spend wonderful, quality time with Danial again. I'm sure things are going to get better since it has already hit rock bottom. I'm at peace with everything now. I just have to move forward and look ahead. We all are...

Harassment

I dread the day I laid eyes on the tenant from hell... Not only he gave us a tough time as a tenant, he gave us a tough time to evict him from our property and worst, he harassed us with nasty, threatening smses demanding his utility deposit back when he didn't even pay for the utility bills throughout his tenancy in our property.
I was upset of course when I received the smses. He even hinted that he's part of a group and we do not want to mess with him. We didn't want to encourage the smses so we did what we thought was best; we lodged a police report as a precautionary measure should anything happen to us. I guess I've been watching too many 'Gerak Khas' series and was very idealistic about the police coming to my rescue. I don't even want to go into how I was passed around between Puchong police station and Putrajaya police station before they decide who would want to take my case. I can strike "Mesra" and "Cepat" from the police force motto.
When the police eventually decided which station should investigate my case, I was still optimistic that they can be "Betul" and do the right thing. I provided them with all the proof and whatever documents I have on this person. However, I wasn't blown to pieces like Altantuya nor do I have any wish to end up like that so nothing happened.
I would have actually let this slide if not for recent calls and nastier smses from the same person after a couple of weeks since we lodged the report. Since, I don't want to be beaten up and my life and the lives of my loved ones are worth more than what this person is asking for, we let him get his way.
Now, I'm not only upset with the tenant from hell, I'm disillusioned with our police force. If they can't protect citizens like me, then, who else can I turn to? Would they actually do something about it if something really bad happened to me? Is "react" the key word instead of "respond"?

Power struggle

It all started when Azrai left Danial and Bibik at Mak Damansara's house on Wednesday. The purpose was to let Nenek Damansara spend some time with her grandson. Little that I know that Mak went out with Azrai for some errands. I know that Bibik has her aprehension towards being in the company of "T" but she went along with it because we told her to.

I went to Damansara after the market outlook meeting at the office. Minutes after I reached there, Azrai and Mak came home. We had lunch and I went out again with Azrai for an appointment. After the appointment, Azrai sent me back to Damansara to pick up Danial and Bibik and I thought that was the end of that.

The next day, Danial started purging. Bibik told me that Danial took some milk (which we discovered was Nutrigen) in Damansara, against her protest. Other than that, Danial was very much himself, good appetite and good mood. So, I decided to wait and see how the day would progressed. Long story short, towards the evening, he started purging again and after the 6th time, we're off to Dr. Chan. Earlier on, we called up and "T" answered the phone. She denied giving Danial anything and we asked Mak, Mak said Danial did have some Nutrigen. Somebody is lying and it's surely not Mak. I was upset because anything that upsets Danial, upsets me more. Danial usually has a strong stomach and can handle food quite well.

So then, came the vengence. Azrai got a call from higher authority to confiscate Bibik's handphone as she's too busy on the phone and neglecting Danial. How stupid is the accusation and I have a good mind of the small minded person who orchestrated it. That's the final straw. I don't discriminate a person on the basis of where they come from and what they do but I'm making an allowance for this. Dasar tak sedar diri untung! I don't understand what is her motive to create havoc in other people's life. Kenapalah dengki kat orang yang sama cari rezeki yang halal. I pray that Allah will balas balik perbuatan dia.

Lesson to be learned from all this; ALWAYS follow your gut feeling. If you feel something is not right, it normally is.

Hair cut

Danial has beautiful soft baby hair. Though I sayang to cut his hair, it's inevitable as his hair was getting longer and I don't want to have people saying what a cute girl he is. After much delays, finally, Azrai took Danial to the barber shop at Alamanda (together with Bibik). My baby is becoming a proper little boy now. Both Azrai and Bibik said that he didn't cry at all when the barber cut his hair and he sat still which is a big deal for a toddler who does not sit still.

On the left, Danial's before picture minutes before going to the barber. Below, the after picture; cheeky as ever!

Azrai's 38th birthday

Get your plates ready
Originally uploaded by Danial Raziq.

We had a Shamsir Clan hari raya makan-makan on Saturday evening, 4th November 2006. I made macaroni soup (own version of minestrone soup) and macaroni caserole. More of ala-Italiano hari raya feast. First to arrived was Aunty Fauziah with Hazlan and family. All in all, it was an almost perfect turn up.

Babah came with Aunty Azizah. She brought some roti jala and kari ayam with her but the car boot was stuck and we couldn't get the food out. Takde rezeki.

I bought a cheese cake for desert and got some candles and we celebrated Azrai's birthday in advanced. I think you can never be too old to blow candles and cut birthday cakes.

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri

Tuesday, 24th October 2006; Selamatlah sudah ibadat puasa selama sebulan and now it's time to celebrate. This year, the family colour theme is red. Hari Raya is fun with Danial. Ami bought Danial his first baju raya. Azrai managed to get the baju raya of the same colour and pattern as Danial's. We were out window shopping when we saw a songkok for Danial and got it for him. He doesn't like to wear a hat and I was trying to keep him from taking off his songkok while taking our family picture on pagi raya. It's some sort of a tradition that I'm trying to establish; taking family photo on hari raya morning.

We went to fetch Mak and "T" and shoot off to Seputeh as Babah was there to beraya with him. Later, we took Babah's Chairman and balik kampung. Adik arrived shortly after we did and we had a small birthday celebration for him (picture below). For many years, I think Adik was really looking forward for hari raya this year. For one, it falls on his birthday. He made baju raya for himself courtesy of a generous friend and those who knew that his birthday falls on hari raya gave him extra nice birthday presents. Azrai and I bought him a Sony PlayStation 2 and he loved it. He's been very generous with Danial; getting Danial clothes and stuff so we thought we give him something he really wants and he's been hinting on a PS2 for a long time.

Anyway, back to hari raya. Raya is more meaningful with Danial.

Over the weeks...

I have thoughts of blogging whenever a something out of norm happened but days passed by and the thoughts were left as thoughts. Other more important things occupied the front seat of my priority lists and there were hardly any vacancy for blogging to come to the front. So, I'm going to go on a quick recap of things happened over the weeks since my last blog entry.

Danial had his measles immunization shot the week he turned 1 year old and a week after that he had fever. That was the week where we started fasting (Ramadhan). At first, we thought that it's just a reaction of the shot that he took earlier. But the fever persisted for the next three days and my biggest fear is Dengue fever. So, not taking any chances, we went back to Dr. Chan, Danial's pediatrician, and got some medications. He says it's too early to confirm if it's Dengue or otherwise. The next day, Danial came out with red spots on his body and face. I got worried and took him to Dr. Chan again. This time, Alhamdulillah, Dr. Chan confirmed that it's not Dengue. It's a common baby's measles called Roseola Infartum. So, Danial got his medicine and off on the road to recovery a few days after that.

We all balik kampung and berbuka there one friday (October 9th) when Adik got some time off from globe-trotting. By "We" I mean, Papa, Mama, Adik, Azrai, me, Danial and Bibik. We made a pit stop at Semenyih to get some satey for buka puasa. We were late as Azrai came home after work and trafic in Semenyih was bad. We reached kampung minutes before buka puasa. Danial didn't even get the chance to take his bath as it was too late. Anyway, nothing special there. We brought the food for buka puasa anyway. Nenek is too old to be bothered with us anymore. Not that we would want us to fuss around anyway. Gone were the days where Atuk and Nenek would run around the house to catch a chicken to cook for their grandchildren. My brother, Boy, Atuk's favourite grandson was a chicken freak. He only eats fried chicken with chili sauce. I'm sure the chicken community at my grandparent's home was reduced to a significant number due to my brother's preference for chicken. If Boy is reading this, I wondered whether he still remembered... If he does, I could just picture him smiling to himself while reading this blog.

On Thursday, October 12, I was informed quite at the last minute that I have to attend a training session in Casa Rachado, Port Dickson for 2 days. I left in a hurry, got Bibik to prepare my suitcase and rushed off to PD. Good thing it started after lunch or I'd be considered as MIA. I later found out that I can get a discount for the rooms so I booked an apartment and got Azrai to drive over with Bibik and Danial after berbuka. The apartment was huge and rather eerie. I wasn't really that scared because I know that during bulan puasa, all demons are locked up. Nevertheless, the apartment did give me the shivers. I put my suitcase when I checked in and only went up to the apartment when Azrai arrived. Since it's puasa month, the hotel sent up food for sahur at 10pm. Azrai suddenly wanted to go out and look for food and I went along with him leaving Danial asleep with Bibik. We were still driving around to find food when Bibik called, rather worried that Danial has been crying non stop since we left the apartment. So, we didn't get the food we went out looking for and drove straight back to Casa Rachado. I managed to console Danial and he settled down. Maybe, he's not used to the new surrounding as I stood by my belief that all demons are locked up during Ramadhan. He slept with us that night and nothing strange happened. I didn't want to go back to the room alone the next day so I took my bag out when I went to class at 9am.

After the class, I drove back to Putrajaya. I had a date to keep with Lynne. We've made arrangement to buka puasa together to celebrate our friendship. It's been a while since the two of us actually sit down together and have quality girlfriends' time together so I was looking forward for that. I suggested that we got each other a little token to commemorate the event and know what I'd get for Lynne. By 4pm, I took Bibik and Danial to Aunty Mie's house to get a gift for Lynne. Aunty Mie showed me some nice crystal bracelet and I chosed one for Lynne. Left Danial and Bibik at Setiawangsa and Papa sent me to the LRT station. I took the LRT to KLCC and met Lynne at Chilli's. Good thing Lynne went there to book a seat. It was packed! We exchanged gifts. Lynne is into crystals and she gave me a lovely butterfly brooch. We chatted, we talked about our kids, work and family, we reminisced, we laughed, we had a good time. Good food, good company, good time... sometimes, these small pleasures in life, make life worth living. To Lynne, thank you for being my friend. As Adik would put it, Kawan menangis. You've been my kawan menangis and stood by me through my ups and downs and I look forward for many more years of friendship, my dearest friend, I love you...

I haven't touched the topic about haze. It's back again and I think this time with a vengence. It's really bad. Visibility is low and you can even smell the burnt smell in the air. I guess it's the culprit for Danial waking up with a sore throat a few days ago. We limit his time outdoors and reminded Bibik time and time again not to take Danial outdoors too much. So, he started with some coughs and a slight temperature. Azrai took him to Dr. Chan after buka puasa with the staff at Johnny's Alamanda. Good thing, Danial drinks lots of water which helps.

As for my hari raya preparation, I'm all for it. We've got a new buffet table, some new curtains and some decorative lights. Papa made pelita out of Danial's Gerber bottles and came over last Tuesday, October 18th to put them up around the house and buka puasa with us. Mama came along with some resentment (which I'm not going to get into and spoil my happy blog). Nevertheless, the we're the only house that's decorated with lights and showed some signs of celebrating hari raya. While the rest of the neighbourhood seems oblivious of the festivities around the corner (which is rather odd considering the majority in the area are Malays) we are all excited to welcome Malam 7 Likur, Raya and stuff. For the past 3 days since Papa put up the pelita around the house, Bibik and I have been religiously lighting the pelita just before buka puasa. I remembered how Boy and I would play bunga api and mercun (fireworks) malam raya kat kampung. I don't know whether Danial would get the chance to play bunga api anymore since the government ban any sale of fireworks. Those were the good old days.

I'm still contemplating whether I want to bake raya biscuits and cakes. I did tell Bibik I'd do it if I 'raya' early this year. I've already started raya last Wednesday but haven't bought the ingredients for anything yet. I still have a few days to go before raya. We'll see how it goes. There's always ready made cookies I can buy from the stores as last resort.

For my dear brother, Boy, we'll be celebrating Hari Raya InsyaAllah on 24th of October which is Adik's birthday. Most probably balik kampung on the first raya after I visit my inlaws in KL. I don't know how's the connection in kampung but if it's good, I hope you don't mind if we call you. Let Atuk and Nenek hear your voice. After all, they are so old and fragile, you don't know when's the next time you'd be able to hear their voices again. So until then, Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri, Maaf Zahir Batin.

Ramadhan Al-Mubarak

It's puasa time again. I remembered, this time last year, I was in confinement, busy nursing Danial. Waking up at wee hours in the night or early morning to feed him. He demands a lot and I was usually famish after feeding him. Well, that was last year. This year, before puasa month started, I was already fasting to ganti balik the whole month puasa that I didn't do last year. I almost made it but nature has to take it's course and I had my period a week before puasa and still owe 6 days which I have to double after the puasa month on top of whatever days I can't puasa during the current month.

Puasa actually started today, Sunday, 24th September 2006 but my period hasn't cleared yet so I couldn't puasa on the first day, which means I miss the first terawih. Azrai and bibik got the first terawih while I stayed at home with Danial.

Today, it seems that I'm ok to puasa tomorrow so, earlier this evening I went for terawih at masjid putrajaya. I can't explain how calm and serene I feel as I walk into the masjid and be part of the jemaah for terawih. No doubt it's a bit warm but I was happy that I'm able to perform terawih tonight. In fact, I felt a lump in my throat as I walk through the doors of the masjid, an overwhelming feeling that God Almighty is watching over me and how small I felt amongst thousands of jemaah masjid. I almost cried...

Time flies when you're having fun

Tomorrow I'm organizing majlis tahlil and doa selamat for Danial's first birthday. Alhamdulillah, we're touching the one year mark in one piece, no broken bones, perhaps some bumps and bruises, and even mosquito bites, but overall, we did OK. It seems like it was only yesterday that we brought Danial home from the hospital. How, tiny and fragile he was then. He's come a long way since then, achieving many progressive milestones; Making every bit of parenting worth while. I'm getting all emotional thinking about this... I do look forward to new discoveries with Danial as he grows up. But when I look back, I wish I can still keep him in my tummy... he is growing up so fast. Soon, he's going to walk and run and do a lot more things and I'll no longer be the centre of his world... Naah! I'm not going to go there. I've read somewhere where a very wise parent said that the duty of a child is to grow up and live his or her own life. I'll make the most of everything when Danial still needs me now and for a good few more years to come and I'll be grateful when Danial becomes a man with all the good values that we instill in him, Insya'Allah...

Moving on to the party bash tomorrow. Well, it's not exactly a party bash. It's more of kenduri tahlil and doa selamat. A more solemn affair. I want to thank Allah for blessing us with Danial, healthy and perfect in every way possible. (Every mom feels the same way about their children) Plus, Danial is too young for a proper birthday party where soon enough he'll be wanting birthday presents, balloons, cakes, games and what not. I think I'll worry about that when he's a pre-schooler.

Though his birthday is not until next wednesday (20th September), we decided to have it earlier because next weekend we'll start fasting and people would want to go for terawih and so on. I plan to have a more intimate birthday celebration with just Danial and Azrai. We get to have him all to ourselves for this first few years of his life. I love being a mommy! If I have to choose one identity or profession for life, a MOMMY is definitely one I'm holding on to.

Getting ready

Wow! Danial is going to turn one year old soon. Well, next Wednesday, September 20th to be exact. It felt just like it was only yesterday that we brought him home from the hospital and now he's almost one. I must say, it's the best 365 days of our lives, looking at life from Danial's perspective. The discoveries and achievements he made from day to day is pure joy. What we take for granted as grown ups are given new meaning seen through Danial's eyes. What miracle the baby brings into our lives... with that we're grateful to Allah for blessing us with a healthy baby boy, Danial Raziq.

With that, we are planning to have Danial's first birthday party in our new home in Putrajaya. It's not so much of a birthday bash. It's more of kenduri tahlil and doa selamat. I'm using a caterer to cater for dinner. Basically, we're all set up for the tahlil which is going to happen this coming Saturday evening, 16th September. Only families and neighbours and some folk from the nearby surau to baca yassin and solat Isyak berjemaah. Semoga Allah memberkati and murahkan rezeki Danial Raziq.

Tomorrow, I plan to take the day off to help bibik clean up the house. Bibik has done most of the work. I need the time off anyway. I've been very busy with work the past few weeks that I feel that I'm keeping a 9 to 5 job again. But having said that, it feels good to be working on a full swing again. To be in the thick of things and to be where the action is. I think I keep that for the next blog before I get side tracked.

TGIF

Boy, am I glad that its friday. This week has been a busy week. Azrai and I left for Johor Bahru on monday for some work leaving Danial behind with Bibik. Nenek Setiawangsa came to supervise and spent the night while we're away. We came back on tuesday after my appointments with my JB clients. I went for the regular meeting at Ascendur on Wednesday. I got a pleasant surprise when I was told that I'm fourth place for top consultant in MCGP case. Thursday was a long day for me. I was busy preparing for my corporate proposal in the morning. Went to send the car for servicing with Azrai and took Azrai's car for my appointments. Had two appointments back to back. I had time before the next meeting at 6.15pm so I went back home thinking I can do some work on another corporate proposal I need to submit the next day but time flies when I'm with Danial. I had to rush off when I realized it's already 5.30pm. I spent more than an hour with my new business partners and then moved on to the last agenda of the day, Kenduri Arwah at Kak Rozian's place. After the kenduri, we reached home close to midnight and I haven't started anything on the proposal for my 9am meeting. Tried to do work but couldn't keep my eyes open so I turned in at 1pm. Work up with Danial at 6am to finish off work. I think lack of rest is taking a toll on my body where I work up with a headache. I took panadol actifast and got ready for work. The presentation received a very positive response. After that, I spent some time with Aunty Mie till late afternoon. Met up with my other business partner and gave her some business suggestions. Finished off the day with another splitting headache. Alhamdulillah, praises be to Allah, I have a wonderful and understanding husband. He took Danial and Bibik to the pasar malam for groceries shopping and got me dinner. For this and many more, I am trully blessed... I am the lucky one.

Malaysians' lack of road safety awareness

sour face
Originally uploaded by Danial Raziq.

I promise I don't do this often. I don't often put Danial on my lap when we go out for a drive. I'm fully aware the danger that I put my son through everytime we do this. Then again, I am a Malaysian, and once in a while, my bad Malaysian habits do kick in and I succumb to it, not that I'm proud of it.

I am however, happy to record that we have been successful in training Danial to sit in a proper childseat when we travel. He sometime fusses but then again, we have to put his safety first before anything else. I remembered when Danial was little, before we got bibik and I had to drive with Danial in the childseat. I had to time it around the time he'd take his nap so that he can nap during the journey. And to make sure he's breastfed and full. It took a while to get use to planning everything around Danial so that we cut the amount of fusses to the minimum.

I guess it's official now. I'm the disciplinarian in the house. Azrai would give in to Danial if he starts throwing tantrums when he doesn't get what he wants or do things the way he wants. I'm the bad cop, who puts my foot down and do things the way it should be done.

I am grateful that at least we could travel in comfort. We have a decent car to go around with. And if having my baby on my lap is dangerous, my heart is in my throat when I see a child being squeezed in the middle between both parents on a motorcycle on the highway, going 100km per hour. We're talking about no crash helmet for the child, and 3 persons on a motorcycle is just asking for it.

Taking the ERL

Taking the ERL
Originally uploaded by Danial Raziq.

It's a weekend outing for Azrai, Danial and I. Azrai wanted to get a new handphone in Bukit Bintang and I decided to tag along. We brought Danial with us. It's Danial's first ride on the ERL, mine too.

It is very convenient. We enjoyed the trip. Stress-free. We don't have to fight the traffic, or go through the hassle of finding a parking space. It comes with a cost though. Then again, what doesn't?

It's a good thing that I'm a pro at tying the kain batik as a baby carrier. It helps a lot with carrying Danial while walking through the crowd. The kain kendong is both comfortable for both Danial and I. Danial even managed to get his nap while we're at Bukit Bintang browsing through the phones.

After half a day out galivanting around Bukit Bintang (galivanting is hardly a suitable word) with Danial in tow, I'm paying the price now, ouch! my back! I can't wait for Danial to start walking so I don't have to carry him around.

Getting Pregnant

No! I'm not pregnant again. Though we are working towards having a baby brother or sister for Danial but at the time this blog is typed, I'm positively not pregnant.

I was thinking a lot about pregnancy lately. As I was putting away my pregnancy clothes and Danial's clothes, I missed being pregnant. I missed having that little person growing in me, getting the butterflies when the baby starts kicking in my tummy. It's a neat experience that every woman should go through.

Earlier tonight, I was SMSing my cousin sister, Hazel. I got to know that she had another miscarriage. There have been so many that I lost count. I feel sorry for her. I know both Hazel and Is really want a child together. They've been married even before Azrai and I got married. I know how Hazel's feeling after each miscarriage. When I had my first miscarriage (before I got pregnant with Danial), I was devastated beyond anything else. In actual sense, I haven't even bond with the baby yet. It's not even a baby at that stage. It's more of a pea yet I mourn my loss. That's why I wasn't taking any chances with Danial when I got pregnant the second time around. Being pregnant is special... I miss being pregnant again...

I was also talking to my former colleague in Royal Selangor, TBS. She's now 5 and a half months pregnant with triplets after and IVF treatment. She's been married for 10 years and tried other fertility treatments without much success. It is a huge investment for her to have babies. She invested more than RM16K for the IVF procedure and store the remaining of her eggs for an annual fee of RM300 per egg and RM30 per egg monthly. Having babies is very expensive nowadays.

Before I got married, I thought it's easy to get pregnant. I thought I'd get pregnant easily too. My period is always on time but I couldn't be more wrong. After the first miscarriage, we had to get help in the form of Dr. Mani (God bless her) and work on getting Danial. I'm lucky because Azrai is very supportive and made it a lot easier. Thank God that I did have to go beyond taking pills because we hit the jackpot after 3 months.

Danial just turn 10 months yesterday. Time flies when you have a baby around. Danial seems to grow so fast. It seems like only yesterday that I held him for the first time. He was so tiny. Sometimes, when I look at Danial, I'm still amazed that this is the little person that I carried my tummy for 9 months. And when I look back, I've come a long way too. I've added more feathers to my cap. I'm a daughter, a woman, a wife, and a mother...

You DO learn something from Oprah

Rules for Bedtime
"Sleeping with your children or sitting with them 'til they fall asleep is a big no-no," says Jo Frost, ABC's Supernanny and author of Supernanny: How to Get the Best from Your Children.

"Children need to learn to fall asleep by themselves," she continues. "What starts out as a little bit of extra comfort soon turns into a big issue about control. And trust me, your children will put off going to bed just to have you by their side." Try her sleep separation technique so everyone can get a good night's sleep.

Step One: Time for BedTake your child to their bedroom. Read a bedtime story, give them "kisses and cuddles" and tuck them in.

Step Two: Tough LoveSit down on the floor or in a chair parallel to your child's bed so he or she can see the side of your face. As hard as it may be, bow your head and ignore their efforts to talk to you. It is important not to engage your child with eye contact.

Step Three: Stay In BedIf your child climbs out of bed, return them to bed with no eye contact.

Step Four: Distance YourselfEach night, move further and further away from the crib or bed. This pattern gives your child a sense of security in their bedroom.

Supernanny Jo Frost says children stay up at night to get the attention from their parents that they missed out on during the day. "The key message here is," says Jo, "if you spend time with your child during the day you're not neglecting him by putting this routine in place during the night." From the show Supernanny Shapes Up Bratty Kids

More Supernanny Techniques
Enforce discipline with the "naughty stool."

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Azrai and I was watching one of Oprah Show reruns about disciplining kids recently and we've decided that it's a good idea to apply it to Danial. Although I've known about good sleeping habits after reading up about it in BabyCenter.com, watching the show somehow or rather knocked some sense in Danial's Babah.

It wasn't difficult to test the method by Jo Frost. Danial has always has a routine of somesort. So, when it comes to bedtime, instead of Bibik dodoikan Danial to sleep. I took him with me into our room, read him his bedtime story where most of the time Danial would try to eat the book than listen to the story anyway; give him his kisses and cuddles and told him that it's time for bed; put him in his cot with Ty-ty (his stuffed toy) and switch off the lights (The streetlights outside provides good night light). Of course he fusses a little bit. I've already warned both Babah and Bibik not to interfere if Danial starts crying. I stayed in the dark out of his sight. It took him less than 5 minutes to stop fussing, suck his thumb and goes off to dreamland. That's my baby.

Another milestone, he's sleeping through the night now. Instead of having two feedings, one in the middle of the night and the other early morning, he sleeps through and would wake up for his 4am feeding. Having unbroken sleep for 3 quarter of the night, I'm won't complaint about having to wake up at 4am to give Danial his bottle. And the best part is, when he's done, I'd put him back in his cot and he'd immediately go back to sleep. Isn't that wonderful?

True, babies don't come with a manual. You'll never know what's coming next but I think modern parents now have excellent tools to learn about how to raise a child. We have books, the internet. As parents, we have to see what works for the child and stick with it. Having the tools, taking care of Danial is not so much like exploring an uncharted territory. It's more like going for a little treasure hunt.

Little Alexa Tan full moon

We went to Boon's newborn baby girl, Alexa's full moon lunch today. It was dimsum at China Treasure (I think) at Sime Darby Convention Centre near KLGCC. Food was great. Baby was adorable. (I should have put that sentence first instead of the food part). Danial was as active as ever. By now, Azrai and I are expert at tag team. And I notice, as parents with young kids, you'd master the art of eating very quickly.

I envy Jee Wei. She got back her pre-pregnancy figure. How does she do that? I still feel that I'm 3 months pregnant and Danial is almost 10 months now. I haven't been able to shed the extra weight off.

It was a long day today. After lunch. We picked up Danial's nenek together with Makcik Tini and went off to Seremban to visit Danial's Datuk. For more details, read all about it in my earlier blog. Datuk is recuperating. Danial's mom is again too lazy to go into details.

Hahaha... I better watch what I say in my blogs. Liris just told me yesterday that she read my blogs. Good thing I've been on my good behaviour and not use this channel to bad mouth anyone. Though there are some people I dislike, but this blog isn't about them. It's supposed to be about Danial, and everything about Danial. As it is, I've been deviating from the subject matter more often than not. So, to put me back on track, my darling baby, Danial is now a happy baby of 9 months and he has 7 teeth. He loves his Gerber baby food and everything about him is perfect.

Datuk's Birthday

Danial's Datuk was determined not to celebrate his birthday this year. And, on top of that, he announced his intention to be out of KL on his birthday. I guess, God granted his wish. Danial's Datuk didn't celebrate his birthday after all. On the extreme, he ended up in the hospital having his stomach cut up for appendicitis (I think I spelt it right). And of all the hospitals; private or public as you may have it in KL or the Klang Valley, he had to go to Seremban Specialist, which is what he wished for, outside of KL on his birthday. So, there you have it. Your wish is granted.

Boy, did he got everybody worried when we got the news that he has to be admitted for further observation before the doctors knew it was appendix. And being the busy mom to the very active Danial right now, I don't have the luxury to give a detailed account of what actually happened. So in a nutshell, Datuk was operated once the doctor confirmed that his appendix has ruptured and now, Alhamdulillah, he is on the road to recovery.

So, Danial's Datuk, from all of us, we pray that you get well soon.

Putrajaya citizens

On Wednesday, 28th June 2006; we're officially Putrajaya citizens. I think that's the best way to describe our move from Puchong to Putrajaya. Other ways doesn't sound right. From a Puchongite to a Putrajayan, perhaps? Well, anyway, Alhamdulillah, we've been blessed by Allah with abundance to provide a better home for Danial and his siblings (hopefully)

This blog also serves to remind me that moving is a major headache and to think a thousand times before deciding to move. The next time we're going to move, I'm going to get professional packers and movers to do the job. I just get the cheque ready. Let the professionals do the job. Now, instead of having one house in a mess, I have TWO house in complete chaos!

At the end of the day, I guess it's all worth it. After all, Putrajaya is the administrative centre for Malaysia and all the infrastructure are well in place. The foundation is set for Danial. Baby, I hope you'll appreciate all the things your babah and I do for you to get you started out right.

As for house warming... lets see how soon can I get the mess cleared. I might as well plan my house-warming to coincide with Hari Raya celebration. Then, that'll give me enough time to sort out everything.

A Malaysian Wedding

I call it a Malaysian Wedding because it's not exactly an Indian wedding, nor it is a Malay wedding. The bride is Linda, a malay lady and the bridegroom is Kumaran. The unique thing about their wedding is it'a a symbol of national integrity; a malay bride, an indian bridegroom and a chinese dinner wedding reception. Where can you get that? Only in Malaysia.

Both bride and bridegroom are friends of mine. Kumaran and I used to work together in Business Trends (now Kelly Services) and he introduced me to Linda, his girlfriend then. Linda later became my investor and a good friend. I admire Linda because she's very mature for her age.

I get to meet a lot of Kelly Services staff there. It's like Kelly Services quarterly meeting, we joked with each other. I was at a table together with all the ex-Kelly; Andy, Andrew, Sri (which I didn't get to know before) and Yazid and wife. I guess everybody did well after they left Kelly, especially Yazid. He coaches kids football now. His passion. What luck to land a job that you're trully passionate about. It doesn't seem like work at all.

Tonight, I learn 3 important things as a wife when the MC gave Linda this advice; "Don't nag", "Don't nag", "Don't nag". And for the hubby, "Listen to your wife", "Listen to your wife", "Listen to your wife". Simple rule... yet difficult to do.

Brothers Reunited

Boy and Adik
Originally uploaded by Rahim Rahman.

After 11 years, they get to meet each other again. I took the title from Boy's flickr set. I've been saying this again and again and I'll say it again, I wish I was there... Eleven years... a lot of things have happened. People change. Everything else change. Like the saying that goes something like, 'Changes are constant' or is it 'The only thing that's constant is 'change''. You get what I mean. It gives me a warm and fuzzy feeling looking at the pictures where my brothers stand next to each other, all grinning from ear to ear. I'm sure they had a good time as what I see in the pictures. No broken bones. Renewed appreciation for siblings. Boy didn't use any of his kung fu chops on Adik.

Looking back at old times, I remembered how miserable Boy made Adik's life; with constant bullying and harassing. And now, looking at the pictures, I'm proud to say that that's all in the past. (I hope). It's true what they say, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder".

I guess everybody did their growing up along side with growing old. "Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional". I wonder, after years of American food, and now health food, how would Boy's stomach react to the sambal ikan bilis that I made for him...

He ain't heavy, he's my brother

Spring hair-do!
Originally uploaded by Rahim Rahman.

Adik is flying to Los Angeles and Boy is flying from Denver to meet him there. I'm excited at the prospect of my brothers being reunited after 11 years. I wish I could be there with them but it's no bus ticket to go to the States. Of all the things my dear brother could have asked for, he asked for sambal goreng ikan bilis... That's a walk in the park for me. So, the evening before Adik is due to fly, I went to Giant to get the ingredients. Adik specifically asked me to cook it and not Bibik, for fear Bibik would not make it the way mama does. So, I'm the next best thing. I hope they get to catch up and make up for lost time. I love my brothers dearly. Adik adores Danial and likewise, Danial loves his Ami. I think, given the chance, Boy would be a great uncle to Danial too.

My readers...

When I first started blogging, I didn't expect people to read my entries. At most, it'll be Boy, my brother, Danial's uncle in the States and Azrai, Danial's dad, on occasions. The blog helps as a channel to vent my thoughts, feelings and everything else to keep me sane. Only recently, Colin, our friend in England emailed me saying that he read my blogs. I was pleasantly surprised. All my whining became a reading pleasure to my readers. Then, a few weeks later, I met Nami. She too told me that she read my blogs and could really understand where I was coming from struggling with the baby and the pure bliss of having a maid to help out at home, and the works. Wow! that's too much! My reader base has increased by 100%! From 2 readers to 4!!!! 4 today, 4 million readers tomorrow!!!!

Sweet for my sweet, sugar for my honey...

Not for my honey-bunny Danial's babah. We soon found out the cause of his upset stomach and under the weather condition were due to his rising sugar level in his blood. We found out about it when we came home from Awana Kijal and went to see Doctor Amarjeet Singh. Call it woman's intuition, I somehow had a sneaky feeling that his diabetes is acting up again. Lo and behold, I was right. Not that I want to be right this time. So, the good old doctor put Azrai on a week's no rice diet much to Azrai's dismay.

I was a bit worried for Azrai. Dieting is not one of his strong point and he simply loves rice. I feel sorry for him. He looked miserable with the bread and soup diet that he had to put up with. He has to go back on his medication to control the sugar level despite taking D-tics, a herbal supplement that used to be enough to control the sugar level for him. He had a full blood test done just to reveal another abnormality, the enzymes reading from his liver is unusually high. This led to a visit to do ultra sound which results turned out to be OK, thank God!

The moral of the story, Danial's dad is not getting younger so he has to take care of himself for his sake and more so for Danial's sake.

Happy Birthday Dzareen!

We celebrated Danial's Aunty Dzareen's Golden Birthday at CIAO! Jalan Ampang. Other than the ambience, I begin to understand that the reason why they name the joint as such is because of the service. It was so slow that 'Ciao' would be the only word they would hear from their first time customers at the end of the meal and never come again. Maybe I'm being harsh. But as a first time customer, after that evening, that would be the last time I would go there. Unless of course, someone else is buying

To Dzareen, Happy birthday dear and many more to come.

Awana Kijal

We didn't plan to go for another holiday after Langkawi but Aunty Mie called at the eleventh hour and asked us to come along for Pak Long's squad reunion in Awana Kijal over Wesak day holiday. The offer was too good to pass when the room rate is way below the rack rate and what more, during peak season. So, on Wesak day, 12 May 2006, we packed everybody up in the car and started our journey bright and early. Well, not all bright. Azrai was complaining of stomach discomfort and nausea; so I offered to drive. Good thing the weather was nice and pleasant so I don't mind driving. Poor Azrai, trying to cope with his discomforts.

Long story short, it was a busy retreat. You can bet if Aunty Mie is the ring leader, there would be tones of fun. Everybody enjoyed themselves. There were telematch, treasure hunts, dinner and karaoke with lots of prizes to bring home and best of all, this was the chance for all the atuk-atuk and nenek-nenek to behave like their grandchildren.

Langkawi getaway

It has been a while since Azrai and I went for a holiday. Since Azrai has never been to Langkawi, I thought that would be an ideal destination. I made the reservation months in advance, through Air Asia website, hoping to get a good deal for the holiday. It's my way of thanking Azrai for being a wonderful husband and daddy to Danial.

Danial's papatok sent us to the airport. We had to go to the new Low Cost Carrier Terminal or LCC terminal for short. It's like a posh hangar with McDonald's and other shops in it. We got to the terminal around 3.15pm just to learn that our flight will be delayed. So, what do you do in a posh hangar with McDonald's in it, you eat to kill time... and I wonder why I've become what I am today...

They do things at the LCC terminal the old fashion way. There's no passage that leads you to the entrance of the aircraft from the waiting hall, instead, you have to walk on the tarmac towards the aircraft and climb the stairs to get into the aircraft. Basically, the whole experience is like going back in time... Dejavu...

Danial's first aircraft ride went well. He seems to understand that he needs to drink a lot to reduce the pressure in his ears. I guess sucking his thumb helps too. He hardly fusses at all. Good thing the flight was just under and hour. A good introduction to Danial.

The car rental guy was waiting for us at the airport. We got a brand new Sentra to move around in... nice... First stop, hotel to check in. I booked us in Aseana Resort, somewhere near Pantai Cenang. Since it was already late to do anything in Langkawi, we stayed in the hotel; gave Danial a bath, his first using a shower too and while I put Danial to sleep, Azrai went out to the many warungs scattered in Pantai Cenang to get dinner.

We went to Kuah town after Azrai got back from his cold-calls to Langkawi Hospital. I had rojak ketam for lunch at some warung nearby Bayview Hotel. Showed Azrai the duty-free shopping Langkawi style. Basically, the Malays would buy the household items like Corelle dinner set, or Corningware or Vision kitchen set. The non-Malays would buy beer and liquor. I just found out from Adik that in Langkawi, Coke is more expensive than beer!

I wasn't planning on buying anything so we just moved around, window shopping from one shop to another shop. It was a hot and tiring affair what more when Danial decided that it's all too much for him and took a nap. Good thing that I've been watching Bibik tie the kain batik to kendong Danial and thus able to kendong Danial in the kain batik.

Nothing much in Kuah if you don't think of doing any shopping. Next stop, the cable car. We passed Burau Bay along the way. I don't know why we decided to go on to the cable car which Azrai later regretted as he has vertigo. It was rather scary when the cable car stopped midway and there's eerie silence. You feel the cable car sway when it gets windy... but we did it and have pictures to prove it. Good thing we didn't stop at the stations on top of the hill or we'd get caught in the rain on the way down which would be even more terrifying.

Having a baby means no more night action when you go for a holiday. Plus it rains in the evening means only Azrai gets to check out what's happening in the night life in Pantai Cenang when he goes out to buy dinner.

On our last day in Langkawi, we went back to Kuah and walk around the Dataran Lang and take some pictures. Danial had his afternoon nap while we packed and requested a late check out since our flight home was at 5.35pm. With some fuel left and a few hours to kill, we drove up to Datai Bay and checked out Datai and Andaman; two of the top hotels in Langkawi.

All in all, it was a good holiday. Azrai and Danial is already asleep. Time for me to got to dreamland too...

Help is here!

Finally, help is here. We got our maid from Indonesia last Saturday, 25th March 2006. Her name is Tuminah. I, personally was a bit apprehensive, having a stranger in our house, what more leaving Danial in her care. But all my doubts were laid to rest after three days. So far, she has met my expectations and more. I'm grateful that my prayers have been answered. Danial was the acid test and she passed the test with flying colours on the first day itself. Danial instantly warmed up to him very much to my relief.

Now, my house looks and feels more and more like a home. Not that it's not home before. It's just that I'm too busy with Danial to do anything much in the house. With Bibik around, the kitchen, bathrooms, floor, and everything she touches is much cleaner. Although we had to cough up a little bit more than RM4,000 to get her in, I think it's money well spent. I just hope that she's a keeper.

Tomorrow will be another milestone. Bibik is going to cook for the first time and we'll leave her with Danial at home for the first time too. I've asked Adik to hang around since he's not working just to keep an eye on them, just in case. I'm sure everything will be OK.

Weekend retreat and new member to Shamsir Clan

Liris and Rizal got married yesterday, saturday, March 11, 2006 at Masjid Wilayah, Kuala Lumpur. The occasion marked a few firsts for Danial; first visit to the mosque, first wedding, first time in the Orchid Room, Lake Club. The ceremony went smoothly. Azrai and I were merely guests. We were there to make up the number and represents mak's family.

I was looking forward for the reception the next day as it's supposed to be a retreat for us. When else can you stay in a 5 star hotel if there's no special package for family members of the bride and groom having their wedding reception at the hotel.

I'm glad we did take a room at JW Marriot. It was very nice. We requested a cot for Danial too. The room wasn't ready when we got there around 11am so we hung around the grand ballroom and watched the rehearsal. It wasn't necessary but Babah asked Azrai to help out with the ushering of guests at the reception. I don't think they needed our help because it looked liked they had everything under control.

We went to Bukit Bintang Plaza and had lunch at Shakey's Pizza. As usual, we had to take turns having lunch. We got used to it after a while, it's not big deal. And Danial is easier to managed as he gets older. It's true what people say, he's at the age where he's more fun to play with because he can respond to you. In his own way, he can tell that he's happy, bored, hungry, sleepy, tired and a lot more. He laughs at the funny faces we make and it's a real treat.

I got myself a new pair of shoes for the reception and a wedding gift which we nearly forgot to get. While I was deciding what to buy, Azrai took Danial to the children's department (our favourite department in any departmental stores, we tend to gravitate around this area) and by the time we teamed up again, Danial got a clip on fan and a rubber ducky that cost 40 ringgit! Kids' stuff sure ain't cheap nowadays.

Danial was really tired when we got back to the hotel. He slept until 7pm. Azrai gave him a bath before getting ready and reporting for duty. I fed Danial and he managed to dozed off during the feed. We went down to the grand ballroom around 8.30pm, just before the reception begins. Again, we have to tag team with Danial. He can't sit still for long so Azrai took him out to the lobby in his stroller while I had my dinner and then I took over. Things parents do to keep their baby happy.

Everything went smoothly and beautifully. Liris was demoure (did I get this right?) and Rizal looked sharp. Ghaz sang for them as a wedding gift. Cheap skate! (did I get this right too?) What I enjoyed most was the short presentation of the photos taken during the akad nikah ceremony. There were candid pictures of the bride and groom of course, as well as other family members. There was one good one of Azrai; and Danial too. Azrai is very photogenic and Danial takes after him. He's a natural in front of the lens.

We didn't hang around after the reception. Danial was a good excuse to get away. We put Danial in his cot initially but he kept stirring once too often, eventually, we let him sleep with us on the big bed. He loved it and slept so soundly. So, at the end of the day, everybody is happy with a good night's sleep.